The reason for Jo March's non-conformity can be found in her description: she has the "uncomfortable appearance of a girl who was rapidly shooting up into a woman and didn't like it." Jo represents that age in a girl's life when she must give up her old ways, which "didn't matter so much when [she] was a little girl," and take up the ways of womanhood as prescribed by society. However, Jo refuses to place herself into that frame, feeling it to be a compromise of herself as she is still a "little girl" at heart, and strives to rebel. This rebellion comes in the form of assertion and intentional non-conformity. Thus, Jo obstinately lies on the rug, uses slang words, whistles - gets up to "boyish tricks," generally. She proclaims herself the "man of the house," "plays brother" to the sisters, and wishes she were a boy, a better fate than the one she believes herself resigned to, wherein she must "grow up, and be Miss March, and wear long gowns and look as prim as a China Aster." That being said, I don't believe her every non-conforming act is merely a result of her not wanting to grow up into a proper "lady." She naturally exhibits some masculine qualities; for example, she often takes leadership in games, even when she is with Laurie, rather than submitting as a follower. Her defining trait is her temper, a rage suitable for any man. At the same time, she displays a touch of female domesticity, as evidenced in chapter five, when she "rights" Laurie's disorganized room. Thus, while Jo attempts to make herself as boyish as possible, she very realistically possesses both feminine and masculine traits. This duality is perfectly represented in her "one beauty," her hair, whose loss she - vain as any woman - mourns, though she keeps the locks "bundled...out of her way" as she goes about her "boyish tricks." The hair represents that, while she does act against conformity, there are aspects of her personality which naturally conform to the traditional view of a woman.
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I think the idea of Jo attempting to master her temper as an example of her conforming to a standard misses some key points of the story.
There is the point about her mother, to begin with. As the post to which I reply stated, she "works hard everyday to overcome" her temper. However, she doesn't do this to satisfy society's expectations. In the eighth chapter, Mrs. March says that it was her husband who helped her overcome impatience: "He never loses patience, never doubts or complains, but...works and waits so cheerfully that one is ashamed to do otherwise." Notice that patience is embodied in a male figure. Mrs. March does not model herself after some abstract perfect woman; rather, she strives to imitate the good behaviour she sees in a man, because she recognizes it as virtue.
Moving on, Jo does not attempt to overcome her temper because she is trying to live up to ideals - there is no evidence in the story for this. She attempts to do so because she realizes that the consequences of a hot head can be dire (ie. she realizes that a sister is a hefty price to pay for anger).
In the post to which I reply, it was said that, since Marmee still feels anger, her and Jo's "efforts are not to become better...but to seem to be such, as society wishes them to be." The story illustrates, however, that patience IS better than impatience. By mastering patience - the ability to not lash out in pride and anger with regrettable actions - one DOES become better, rather than merely seeming to do so.
Perhaps readers are inclined to believe Jo has conformed because her father states that she is no longer the "son Jo" of one year ago, but a "young lady." It is true that Jo has changed and, yes, the result of her changing has made her more tame, and therefore more "lady-like." However this does not mean that becoming lady-like is Jo's motive - far from it.
That one changes in life (as we all do) does not mean that one conforms.
SOURCE
Alcott, Louisa May. Little Women. New York: Signet Classic, 2004.
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